It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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