your thong is hanging out like whoa
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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