i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize