This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
