Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
