I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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