I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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