I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
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