He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize