I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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