Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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