i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
