I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize