Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
