she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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