im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
