He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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