New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
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I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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