So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
