so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
