Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
