I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
ugly people sure do ruin things
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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