That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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