I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
