The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
