Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize