I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
