nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
