3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
