Did you just see the Batmobile???
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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