You really coming over, don't trick.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Randomize
