i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
