I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
