"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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