then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize