i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
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