my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
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