You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
