butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
