Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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