I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
