am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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