I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
