it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize