Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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