Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
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I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
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No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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