That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
