so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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