Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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