Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
