Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
